Kim Harms

Life Reconstructed



“You and dad are like love birds.”

It was a simple observation on the part of my five-year-old, but to me it was a statement of affirmation from God through my little boy’s voice. One of my strongest desires is for my children to find security in my relationship with their daddy. That the regular “I love you(s), the bear hugs that pick me up off the floor and the way he makes me laugh like no one else can won’t go unnoticed. Lewis’ comment reassured me of his confidence in the relationship his dad and I have. In the little things throughout the day, Lewis sees love.

We don’t “act loving” for the purpose of giving our children confidence in our relationship, but blessing them with that assurance is a wonderful byproduct of the affection we show each other. And we do not have a perfect marriage, but we are committed to our commitment. We choose love every morning. I did not say we feel love every morning, because to be truthful, there are days that I wake up a little grumpy and don’t really feel like loving anyone. On those days, I’m pretty sure Corey doesn’t feel like loving me either. But I think one of the most important things a spouse can do is to choose love even when they don’t feel like it. That’s where the strength of the commitment is tested. For almost 14 years of sunrises we have chosen love, and we have vowed to continue making that decision every day of our lives.

Last winter we had the opportunity to celebrate my great-uncle Marlowe and my great-aunt Hildy’s 50th wedding anniversary with them. As we were saying our good-byes, Marlowe made a motion with his foot as if he was drawing a line. “We’ve set the bar,” he said.  “We expect you to follow us.”

Oh we will Marlowe. We might be too many miles behind you to see the line right now, but we are heading in the same direction. Unless the Good Lord decides it’s time for one of us to fly home, we will get there. Don’t you worry about that. After all, we are lovebirds.


Author: Kim Harms

I am a contributor at CT Women (previously known as Today's Christian Woman where I was a regular contributor as well). I blog monthly at and have freelanced for a variety of publications including Chicken Soup for the Soul, Guideposts, Thriving Family and Creation Illustrated. Cancer made an unwelcome visit in my breast in January 2016, and I am now working on a book about breast reconstruction after having gone through the insane process myself. My incredible husband of 18 years, Corey, is my biggest writing cheerleader and together we are having a ball raising our three growing boys; Carter 15, Owen 14 and Lewis 10.

4 thoughts on “Lovebirds

  1. Kim — so sweet — your blog is a blessing for me! Karen (Combs)

  2. I loved your words..your Choose LOVE every morning. Great stuff for every marriage:). And also Marlowe’s words of encouragement..loved them too! Thanks Dear !!

  3. It makes me happy when God uses my words to bless someone else. Thanks for the comments! It also makes me happy to see Hildy and Marlowe in love after 50 years.

  4. Yep, it’s a choice. Thanks for the reminder and encouragement.

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